- PPF Points
- 2,100
Alright, buckle up, because wow, the internet is basically a minefield for anyone chasing quick cash. Sure, real gigs are out there — freelancing, e-commerce, creating stuff on YouTube, legit investments, you name it. But for every solid opportunity, there’s like, a battalion of scams in skinny jeans, waving “side hustle” flags and whispering sweet nothings about “passive income.”
Listen, I’ve been duped. Hell, most people have! I’ve clicked those shady links, listened to some dude in a snapback on a “live webinar,” even joined a couple sketchy Telegram channels that were, uh, not helpful. I’m writing this because man, you deserve a warning before you torch your cash and your patience like I did.
Here’s a savage little list of five money-making “opportunities” you’d be way better off ignoring. Let’s go.
1. The $7 Digital Product Funnel (AKA Affiliate-MLM Disguised BS)
The hook: “Start an online biz for SEVEN BUCKS! Make money from your phone! Zero experience!”
Wanna know what this is? Total TikTok and Insta plague. Some smiling “coach” wants $7 in exchange for a “secret” course on affiliate marketing, but here’s the gag: they’re teaching you to sell that very same $7 course… to more suckers. You want more money? Oops, gotta “upgrade” for another $97, $297, et cetera forever.
It’s a hamster wheel:
• Pay for the course
• Get “taught” to sell the same course
• Convince your grandma (and everyone else) to buy it
• Watch the hamster wheel spin
Why is this so insidious? It’s digital MLM with nicer branding. You learn exactly zero useful skills, and the only thing getting sold is the fantasy.
How to spot it:
— “Only $7 to start!” (Then whoops, surprise: UPGRADE time)
— All the “training” is just how to recruit more people
— Endless screenshots of “income,” nada real substance
2. “Crypto Doublers” and Phony Investment Rackets
If you see this pitch: “Send me $100 in Bitcoin, I’ll send back $200 in an hour! 100% GUARANTEED
”—run, don’t walk.
Social media, sketchy comments, spammy DMs—these cons live everywhere. They show you fake “payout” proof, claim they have bots or genius traders, whatever. You send money, and it’s basically gone forever. No tech magic, no flipping, just you and an empty wallet, champ.
What really hurts? You can’t reverse crypto payouts. These scams count on people being greedy or clueless about how this stuff works.
Spot the red flags:
— “Just Venmo me any cash, I’ll flip it to 10x!”
— Endorsements from “celebs” you’ve never heard of (‘wow, thanks, Tony Stark…’)
— No contact info, garbage website, typos everywhere
3. The “Dropshipping Guru” / Copy-My-Store Scam
Some wannabe wolf in a designer hoodie says, “I made $100k in 30 days—just BUY this Shopify store from me and you’ll be RICH.”
Look, dropshipping can work, but these “prebuilt store” packages? Nine times out of ten, total nonsense. They’ll plop some janky site in your lap (bonus points for bad stock photos and spelling errors), and then a hundred other noobs buy the exact same site. There’s no shortcut, and honestly, the only one making bank is the clown selling the template.
To make it worse, some charge “mentorship” or “consultation” fees and then ghost you. Classic.
Proof it’s a scam:
— “Copy my store, Insta-success!” vibes
— $500 for the kind of Shopify template your cousin could build for free
— Silence about what you’ll spend on ads, product testing, or refunds
— Customer support? Never heard of her
4. Pay-to-Apply “Freelance Jobs” and Crappy Job Boards
You’ve seen the ads: “Remote jobs! $50 an hour, no skills needed!” Uh-huh, sure.
Except… the catch is you’ve gotta pay for “exclusive access,” background check fees, or their “secret training.” They promise to unlock life-changing job opportunities, but really? It’s just another money grab.
Typical stunts:
— “Just $47 and you’re in!”
— $99 “processing fee” before you can “start”
— “Mandatory” (and useless) training kit for more $$$
The punchline: you pay, and one of two things happens—nothing, or more paywalls. The job? Doesn’t even exist, friend.
(And yeah, I cut off at 4, but hey, gotta leave you wanting more—or, you know, a chance to rage-quit before you get scammed. Stay sharp out there.)
Listen, I’ve been duped. Hell, most people have! I’ve clicked those shady links, listened to some dude in a snapback on a “live webinar,” even joined a couple sketchy Telegram channels that were, uh, not helpful. I’m writing this because man, you deserve a warning before you torch your cash and your patience like I did.
Here’s a savage little list of five money-making “opportunities” you’d be way better off ignoring. Let’s go.
1. The $7 Digital Product Funnel (AKA Affiliate-MLM Disguised BS)The hook: “Start an online biz for SEVEN BUCKS! Make money from your phone! Zero experience!”
Wanna know what this is? Total TikTok and Insta plague. Some smiling “coach” wants $7 in exchange for a “secret” course on affiliate marketing, but here’s the gag: they’re teaching you to sell that very same $7 course… to more suckers. You want more money? Oops, gotta “upgrade” for another $97, $297, et cetera forever.
It’s a hamster wheel:
• Pay for the course
• Get “taught” to sell the same course
• Convince your grandma (and everyone else) to buy it
• Watch the hamster wheel spin
Why is this so insidious? It’s digital MLM with nicer branding. You learn exactly zero useful skills, and the only thing getting sold is the fantasy.
How to spot it:
— “Only $7 to start!” (Then whoops, surprise: UPGRADE time)
— All the “training” is just how to recruit more people
— Endless screenshots of “income,” nada real substance
2. “Crypto Doublers” and Phony Investment RacketsIf you see this pitch: “Send me $100 in Bitcoin, I’ll send back $200 in an hour! 100% GUARANTEED
”—run, don’t walk.Social media, sketchy comments, spammy DMs—these cons live everywhere. They show you fake “payout” proof, claim they have bots or genius traders, whatever. You send money, and it’s basically gone forever. No tech magic, no flipping, just you and an empty wallet, champ.
What really hurts? You can’t reverse crypto payouts. These scams count on people being greedy or clueless about how this stuff works.
Spot the red flags:
— “Just Venmo me any cash, I’ll flip it to 10x!”
— Endorsements from “celebs” you’ve never heard of (‘wow, thanks, Tony Stark…’)
— No contact info, garbage website, typos everywhere
3. The “Dropshipping Guru” / Copy-My-Store ScamSome wannabe wolf in a designer hoodie says, “I made $100k in 30 days—just BUY this Shopify store from me and you’ll be RICH.”
Look, dropshipping can work, but these “prebuilt store” packages? Nine times out of ten, total nonsense. They’ll plop some janky site in your lap (bonus points for bad stock photos and spelling errors), and then a hundred other noobs buy the exact same site. There’s no shortcut, and honestly, the only one making bank is the clown selling the template.
To make it worse, some charge “mentorship” or “consultation” fees and then ghost you. Classic.
Proof it’s a scam:
— “Copy my store, Insta-success!” vibes
— $500 for the kind of Shopify template your cousin could build for free
— Silence about what you’ll spend on ads, product testing, or refunds
— Customer support? Never heard of her
4. Pay-to-Apply “Freelance Jobs” and Crappy Job BoardsYou’ve seen the ads: “Remote jobs! $50 an hour, no skills needed!” Uh-huh, sure.
Except… the catch is you’ve gotta pay for “exclusive access,” background check fees, or their “secret training.” They promise to unlock life-changing job opportunities, but really? It’s just another money grab.
Typical stunts:
— “Just $47 and you’re in!”
— $99 “processing fee” before you can “start”
— “Mandatory” (and useless) training kit for more $$$
The punchline: you pay, and one of two things happens—nothing, or more paywalls. The job? Doesn’t even exist, friend.
(And yeah, I cut off at 4, but hey, gotta leave you wanting more—or, you know, a chance to rage-quit before you get scammed. Stay sharp out there.)
