- PPF Points
- 5,709
Have you ever asked this question to yourself?
Maybe or maybe not.
Let's leave that for now.
Most of us define other people in our mind and then deal with them accordingly.
For example- We respect our parents, teachers etc, while we don't respect some people because of some attributes, weaknesses, behaviour, missing qualities etc.
But the sad part is that around half of these definitions are invalid and unworthy like-
“He doesn't score good, I shouldn't respect him”
“She doesn't look good, she is unworthy of interaction”
“He is a rickshaw puller, which means he is not successful, I must not respect him”
“He looks like a Greek god, I must adore him, respect him”
“She is so beautiful, I must treat her like a princess” (and behave awkwardly)
These definitions are nothing but a set of rules we have developed in our mind due to our good and bad experiences, stereotypes, judgement, knowledge and learnings.
These detinitions act as a yardstick to judge people.
Similarly, without realising, we also define ourselves in our subconscious mind using the same yardsticks.
Sometimes wrong, sometimes right.
For example-
“I am obese, I am inferior to others”
“I am an average student, I don't deserve to interact with toppers”
“I am short, short people are not smart and can't be appreciated”
“I am what I am, because of my parent’s genes and I respect that”
“I have a life, I am special irrespective of what I have”
“I don't care what others have or don't have, I will treat people with respect and so should they treat me”
These yardsticks reflect our conduct and behaviour.
For example-
If I assume that “I am not a good speaker”
Then whenever I get a chance to speak in public, I will be nervous and will most probably fumble as well.
While, if I modify this thinking to “Anybody can speak” or “I can speak”, I would feel more confident and lose the unneeded symptoms of nervousness.
If I assume that people must be judged only after interaction and not just by looks, I will get a chance to interact with many wonderful people which I would have missed because of a stupid yardstick.
Maybe or maybe not.
Let's leave that for now.
Most of us define other people in our mind and then deal with them accordingly.
For example- We respect our parents, teachers etc, while we don't respect some people because of some attributes, weaknesses, behaviour, missing qualities etc.
But the sad part is that around half of these definitions are invalid and unworthy like-
“He doesn't score good, I shouldn't respect him”
“She doesn't look good, she is unworthy of interaction”
“He is a rickshaw puller, which means he is not successful, I must not respect him”
“He looks like a Greek god, I must adore him, respect him”
“She is so beautiful, I must treat her like a princess” (and behave awkwardly)
These definitions are nothing but a set of rules we have developed in our mind due to our good and bad experiences, stereotypes, judgement, knowledge and learnings.
These detinitions act as a yardstick to judge people.
Similarly, without realising, we also define ourselves in our subconscious mind using the same yardsticks.
Sometimes wrong, sometimes right.
For example-
“I am obese, I am inferior to others”
“I am an average student, I don't deserve to interact with toppers”
“I am short, short people are not smart and can't be appreciated”
“I am what I am, because of my parent’s genes and I respect that”
“I have a life, I am special irrespective of what I have”
“I don't care what others have or don't have, I will treat people with respect and so should they treat me”
These yardsticks reflect our conduct and behaviour.
For example-
If I assume that “I am not a good speaker”
Then whenever I get a chance to speak in public, I will be nervous and will most probably fumble as well.
While, if I modify this thinking to “Anybody can speak” or “I can speak”, I would feel more confident and lose the unneeded symptoms of nervousness.
If I assume that people must be judged only after interaction and not just by looks, I will get a chance to interact with many wonderful people which I would have missed because of a stupid yardstick.
